Apparently this is a true script from Rainbow:


The sketch opens with Zippy peeling a banana.....

Zippy: " One skin, two skin, three skin, four "

George: " Zippy, where is Bungle?"

Zippy: " I think Geoffrey is trying to get him up"

We see a view of the door and hear Bungle moaning from behind it.

Bungle: " Geoffrey, I can't get it in"

Geoffrey: "You managed it last night"

Bungle: "I know, lets try it round the Otherway. Ooooooh, I've got it in"

Bungle and Geoffrey enter the studio with Bungle carrying a hammer and peg kit

Bungle: " Would you stick this on the shelf, George"

George: " I can't reach, you'll have to stick it up yourself, Bungle."

Geoffrey (to camera) " Hello everyone, today we are talking about playing"

Bungle: " Playing with each other, Geoffrey?"

Geoffrey:" Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend that you like to play with?"

George:" Yesterday we played with each other's balls. Are we going to play with our friend's balls today? "

Bungle: " Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well."

Geoffrey (to camera) "Have you seen Bungles twanger?"

Zippy: " Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it."

Bungle: " It's my plucking instrument."

Geoffrey asks the audience if they can pluck like Bungle

Zippy:" I can, I'm the best plucker here."

George: " And I'm go od at banging. My peg's hard isn't it Zippy?"

Zippy:" Well of course it is, Your peg wouldn't go in if it was soft."

Geoffrey: " Let's get back to Bungle's twanger."

Bungle (excited) " Oooooh Geoffrey, we could all play with our twangers couldn't we? Let's play the plucking song. Rod and Roger can get their instruments out and Jane has got two lovely Maracas."

;Singers Rod, Freddy and Jane enter.

Freddy:" We could hear you all banging away"

Rod: " Banging can be fun."

Jane:" Ooooh yes, and I was banging away all last night with Rod and Freddy."

Freddy (looking sad ) " Yes, but it broke my plucking instrument."

Rod ( to Jane ) " Do you want to blow on my pipe while I'm twanging away?"

Jane: " Oh no, I w as banging away with Freddy last night. But would you like to play with my maracas?

Zippy; " No, let's just pluck away with our twangers."

George:" Yes, it doesn't matter what size our twanger is."

Zippy;" I've got a big red one."

George: " I've only got a tiny twanger. But it works well and I like to play with it."

Geoffrey (to viewers) " Well, have you got your twangers out? And remember, you can bang your balls at the same time. If you haven't got any, ask a friend if you can play with his. Now, let's all play the plucking song."

Everyone in studio: " Pluck, pluck, pluck along, we're going to pluck all day."