If you want to be a real geezer it's essential that you get to grips with basic cockney rhyming slang, it will also help you to understand Chas 'n' Dave lyrics. Drop in as many of these phrases to your conversation as possible for that instant "I'm well 'ard and I knew the Krays" effect.

Click here for the Chas 'n' Dave website and more rhyming slang

Almond Rocks socks
Alphonse ponce
Aristottle bottle
Auntie Nelly belly
Bacon and Eggs legs
Barnet fair hair
Bath Bun sun
Battle cruiser boozer
Bees and honey money
Bird Lime time
Bo-peep sleep
Boracic Lint skint
Bottle and Glass arse
Bristol Cities titties
Cash and carried married
Cobblers Awls balls
Cocoa say so
Conan Doyle boil
Crust of bread head
Daisy roots boots
Dustbin lids kids
Elephants trunk drunk
Fife and drum bum
Frog and Toad road
Ginger beer queer
Greengages wages
Hampton Wick prick
Hit and miss piss
Irin Hoof poof
Jack Jones alone
Jam Jar car
Khyber Pass arse
Mince Pies eyes
Near and far bar
North and South mouth
Oily rag fag
Oliver Twist fist
Orchestra stalls balls
Peas in the pot hot
Pitch and toss boss
Plates of meat feet
Potatoes in the mould cold
Rabbit and Pork talk
Read and write fight
Rosy lea tea
Round the houses trousers
Rub a dub pub
Salford docks rocks
Sexton Blake cake
Tea leaf thief
Tom and Dick sick
Two and eight state
Whistle and Flute suit
Pony and Trap crap

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