Spunking on a birds tits (5 points)

Spunking in some birds hair (10 points)

Spunking in some birds eye (15 points)

Kicking some fuckers head in

Shitting in a birds mouth (25 points)

Shitting on your mates car

Shitting in your mates car

Shitting in your pants

Smashing your parents house up while they're on holiday

Getting out of bed every morning and thanking Jah for another beautiful wank

Getting your head kicked in

Girls with low moral standards

Sunny days


Waking up somewhere after a night out and not knowing where you are

Waking up next to some bitch who actually looks nicer than she did when you met her the night before (rather than the other way round)

Pissing through peoples letterboxes

Morning wood

Fucking a prostitute and paying with fake money

Drinking alcohol

Tit wanks

Being sick


Being sick on your mates

Being sick on your girlfriend (20 points)

Claiming they fucked up your order in McDonalds and getting free food out of them

Going away

Coming back

Getting so pissed that you can't talk

Doing a stinking shit round someone elses house

Being rude to people you don't know

Pissing anywhere you're not supposed to

The last few moments before you jazz on/over/in a girl

The glory walk home after leaving a girls house, that you just violated for the first time

Pregnancy tests proving negative

Getting sexually assaulted by a women

Catching someone trying to steal your car (and then fucking them up)

Lying to girls

F**king your friends mum

Telling your friend about what you did to his mum

Breaking things



Not being gay

Gatecrashing parties

Phoning in sick at work

Finding money

Winning money

Getting paid for doing nothing

Laughing at ginger people

Laughing at Germans

Laughing at mullets

Laughing at moustaches

Laughing at geezers

Laughing at fat girls

Sleeping with fat girls

Falling over

Falling down stairs




Give me more of this rubbish